not for wrath, not for ruin, but for the red dawn!

so last night was movie night. someone over in queen anne throws one of these about once or twice a month. always a blast. among the past viewees: super troopers, zoolander, the texas chainsaw massacre (original), brain candy, the royal tenenbaums. that sort of thing. the idea is to watch a movie that we have all seen so nobody gets all pissy about people talking during the the screening, and there will, invariably, be talking since there are always like 15 people crammed into the living room. last week, someone suggested we watch barfly which angered me for several reasons, not the least of which being that it's a mickey fucking rourke picture. also, it's on my short list for crappiest feature films of all time and i have actually *seen* gigli, so i know from crappy. long story short, i get to beth and dave's house at 8:00 for cocktails, hauling 8 bags of chips to feed the hordes. by "hordes," i mean me, beth and dave. i was the first to arrive and i downed a gorgeous jamesons on the rocks while bullshitting with the lord and lady of the manor.

nine o'clock rolls around and we're still the only ones there. turns out everybody got sick or busy and whatnot and totally ditched out on movie night, the fuckers. so beth and dave said i could pick the movie and we watched titanic. oh, bet on it. and they have one of those widescreen tvs, high-definition, the works. it was beautiful. then we decided that every time something billy zane said that would have sounded better when followed by "bitch," we should drink. oh, and also anytime a poor person has a foreign accent. we got well-nigh hammered and ended up scarfing down scores of chips and laughing till our stomachs hurt. although, to be fair, that could have been the chips.

my comedic genius moment of the evening was when i realized that bernard hill who has recently garnered nerd fame as king theoden in the lord of the rings played the captain of the titanic. during the solemn, quiet moment that the captain awaited his watery death, i intoned "where is the horse and the rider..." and beth and dave busted up.

you know, i'm thinking that moment was much funnier that it should have been since we were all drunk.